Boddington is what Ales Brahms. Still, can't clean up with the Pineapple Rag

Friday night here is big "party night", which generally means a sort of Happy Hour (or for me this week, Less Miserable Hour), supper and goofing off -- no correcting or prep for teaching, no reading for classes, no excessive processing of the relationship -- you know: R & R. Like reading all the magazines we don't have time for and unpacking groceries. Woo hoo. After dinner, I decided to put in some piano time and went right  to Brahms. What damage could I do in my 15 minutes of infamy at the piano?

I stumbled through the already nailed first section of the Intermezzo. Fail. Halting, inconsistent, wrong notes, old patterns. I thought I could Just Do It. Ummm. No. I was astonished at how quickly I fell back into poor playing. What was lacking was my attention. This project is not about developing fine motor skills; it is about developing the right mindset to learn some piano music and/or unlearn some that had been spottily played.  Last Friday, I simply could not focus. My muscle memory is not quite retrained for the this piece, either, I don't think. So, without the ability to be mindful, caused in no small part by Boddington Ale, I defaulted to the old ways of playing from the macro to the micro level.

Last summer, I played the bassoon in a Coro Allegro sponsored fundraising event. What was different for me with that performance was my success at playing in a public venue. My personal success I think was due not to big shifts in my ability, but shifts in my ability to focus. I looked at the music,not the audience, I listened with the mind and heart's ear, I felt the music as phrases.I was not distracted by fear of the crowd, fear of failure or fear of my mother in the audience. As a result, my previous patterns  didn't occur. More recently, I was in a performance with my old teacher and she asked if I had been practicing as I seemed to playing better. The answer, I was sorry to say, is not really, but I think my meditation practice is taking hold in that arena. By contrast, Boddington Ale does not help concentration for me. I wouldn't drink and meditate, why would I drink and play the piano with intention?

As I continued to play poorly, I of course got more and more competitive with myself, more and more frustrated, and the whole thing got pretty ugly. I said some unauthorized words, and thinking of Schroeder and his mounting frustration with Lucy, resorted playing "Jingle Bells" with a boogie woogie bass mostly to stop the madness (???) and have a laugh at myself.  Mr. Stripes who usually takes a neutral view towards my piano playing seemed a little alarmed at this.

I thought then to turn to the simpler Pineapple Rag. This went better until I started to stop paying attention to the chord root played in the bass on all the strong beats. Er, this is ragtime. You sort of need that note. I have also been using the pinky of the left hand which is probably my weakest digit. Sadly, in one section, the notes I needed to play were either a B-flat or an F, and I was only hitting that F about 75% of the time. That's all. No tricky chords there. I was getting the chords on the after beats, but the strong beats were, well, weak.

I saw a suggestion in a guitar method once that you should sing the name of the notes you are playing (on pitch of course) in order to reinforce your learning of them on the fretboard. I remembered this after I abandoned the piano bench, and because I am not a beginner, sort of scoffed at this notion, at a least at the time. It might be something to try. It also might be OK if let myself glance down the keyboard to zero in on where that errant note lies. My eyes are not glued to the keyboard normally.

This was an interesting session after the fact. I think I need to just let myself play the piano, Ale or no, for fun and stop always thinking it has to be so goal oriented. I also need to remember the Quit While You Are Ahead Maxim, followed by the Beware the Diminishing Returns Corollary. When I was learning to parallel park, I would try multiple times and when I got it right a couple times in a row, my dad would would let me stop practicing it. I am a good parallel parker now actually. Even between cars.

I also know some people have no problems with altering their consciousness and performing music, and this is not a criticism of that. (Hey, look at Jim Morrison.) I also need to lighten up, I know. (boogie woogie Jingle Bells worked, for example; no clams there.) Perhaps I need to drag out some new stuff or do something that doesn't have the baggage on it. Like mic the bassoon and run it through an effects pedal...